Sometimes friends and loved-ones don't know what to say, other times they just can't be found. If you need words of comfort to strengthen you along your grief journey, 3ABF desires to help through the following resources:
Care Notes are short Christian-based publications developed by Abbey Press. 3ABF provides them free of charge to bereaved families and other loved-ones. These pamphlets include insight and support for a variety of needs. Following is a list of the topics covered:
12 Reflections for the First 12 Weeks of Grief
A Serenity Prayer for Grievers
Be Gentle With Yourself While Grieving
Dealing With the Anger That Comes With Grief
Dealing With Guilt After a Loved One's Death
Feeling Overwhelmed by One Loss After Another
Finding God in Times of Loss
Finding Your Way After the Death of a Spouse
Five Things To Help You Heal When Grief Is New
Five Ways to Get Through the First Year of Loss
Getting Through the First Weeks and Months After the Funeral
Getting Through the Holidays When You've Lost a Loved
Giving Yourself Permission to Grieve
Grief Is What Heals You
Grieving in Your Own Way
Grieving the Loss Your Grandparent
Grieving the Loss of Your Parent
Handling Grief as a Man
Healing Thoughts to Soothe a Grieving Heart
Healing Your Grief Through Prayer and Mediation
Honoring Your Loved One's Memory With a Personalized Funeral
Living With Loss While Others Are Celebrating
Losing Someone Close
Losing Your Grandmother
Losing Your Husband
Losing Your Wife
On the First Anniversary of Your Loss
Scripture Can Help Heal Grief
Six Sources of Strength After Your Spouse Dies
Taking the Time You Need to Grieve Your Loss
Talking With a Child About a Loved One's Death
The Good Funeral
The Signs and Symptoms of Unresolved Grief
The Ten Biggest Myths About Grief
What Everyone Should Know About the First Year of Grief
What's Really "Normal" When You're Grieving?
When You Didn't Get to Say Good-Bye
When Grief Won't Go Away
When Death Comes Unexpectedly to Someone You Love
Widowhood-12 Things You Can Do On Your Own
Wondering If Cremation Is the Right Choice
Please feel free to Contact Us or drop by our office to make arrangements to have a Care Notes mailed to you.
Following are some inspiration quotes from a variety of writers to feed your soul.
It's O.K. to Cry
There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, and of unspeakable love.
Washington Irving
Allow Yourself to Grieve
Let grief do its work. Tramp every inch of the sorrowful way. Drink every drop of the bitter cup. Draw from memory and hope all that they can offer. To see the things our loved ones have left behind will give us daily pain - the clothes they wore, the letters they wrote, the books they read, the chairs in which they sat, the music they loved, the hymns they sang, the walks they took, the games they played, their seat in church, and much more beside - but what would we be without those reminders? Would we like quickly to break with the past in order to assuage grief? Those who truly love will say that they have found in sorrow a new joy, a joy which only the broken-hearted can know.
W. Graham Scroggie
Coping With the Pain
Pain, the gift nobody longs for, still it comes. Somehow leaves us stronger, when it's gone away . . .
From In the Waiting, by Dave Clark, Don Koch and Greg Long
It is sometimes only through suffering that we begin to listen to God. Our natural pride and self-confidence have been stripped painfully away, and we become aware, perhaps for the first time, of our own personal needs.
David Watson, Fear No Evil
Finally, a remarkable thing begins to happen. You notice that for short periods the hurt is not so great. This is the beginning of your healing.
Sharan Morris
Scars are the price of scepters. Our crowns will be wrested from the giants we conquer. Grief has always been the lot of greatness. It is an open secret.
The mark of rank in nature
Is capacity for pain;
And the anguish of the singer
Makes the sweetest of the strain.
Tribulation has always marked the trail of the true reformer. It is the story of Paul, Luther, Savonarola, Knox, Wesley and all the rest of the mighty army. They came through great tribulation to their place of power.
Selected
Finding God in the Midst of Grief
God does not open paths for us in advance of our coming. He does not promise help before help is needed. He does not remove obstacles out of our way before we reach them. Yet when we are on the edge of our need, God's hand is stretched out.
J.R.M.
God never uses anybody to a large degree, until after He breaks that one all to pieces. Joseph had more sorrow than all the other sons of Jacob, and it led him out into a ministry of bread for all nations. For this reason, The Holy Spirit said of him, "Joseph is a fruitful bough . . .by a well, whose branches run over the wall" (Gen. 49:22). It takes sorrow to widen the soul.
From The Heavenly Life
When obstacles and trials seem
Like prison walls to be.
I do the little I can do
And leave the rest to Thee.
And when there seem no chance, no change,
From grief can set me free;
Hope finds its strength in helplessness,
And calmly waits for Thee.
From Streams in the Desert
In the sorest trials God often makes the sweetest discoveries of Himself.
From Gems
Oh, brethren, be great believers! Little faith will bring your souls to heaven, but great faith will bring heaven to your souls.
C. H. Spurgeon
Words for Friends of Those Who Are Grieving
Do small things with great love.
Mother Teresa
There are times when those who grieved cannot be pleased. They can only be loved.
Paula D'Arcy, in When Your Friend is Grieving
Everyone is so anxious for me to get better. They don't want me to hurt. But I do hurt, and I need to cry. If I put on a brave face, it only helps them. It drains me.
Paula D'Arcy, in When Your Friend is Grieving
A definition of mercy: Climbing into the skin of someone and feeling and moving and touching with their hands, walking with their feet, seeing through their eyes hearing with their ears, moving with their feet, beating with their heart.
As a faith-based nonprofit organization, 3ABF truly believes that God has provided many words of truth, comfort and strength in the Bible. We encourage bereaved families and loved ones to seek out and hold fast to God's word for your healing.
Though the list is far from exhaustive, following are some scriptural references to get you started:
"For My thoughts are not your thoughts,
Nor are your ways My ways," declares the Lord.
"For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
So are My ways higher than your ways
And My thoughts than your thoughts.
For as the rain and snow come down from heaven,
And do not return there without watering the earth
And making it bear and sprout,
And furnishing seed to the sower and bread to the eater;
So will My word be which goes forth from My mouth;
It will not return to Me empty,
Without accomplishing what I desire,
And without succeeding in the matter for which I sent it."
Isaiah 55.8-11
Psalm 23 The Lord is your Shepherd… Psalm 42 As the deer pants for the water brooks, so my soul pants for thee . . . Psalm 46
God is our refuge and strength . . . be still and know that I am God . . . Psalm 107.19-22
. . . He sent His word and healed them and delivered them out of their destruction . . . Psalm 121 From where shall my help come - my help comes from the Lord Psalm 147.3 He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds. Isaiah 25.8
He will swallow up death for all time, and the Lord God will wipe tears away from faces . . . Isaiah 41.10 Do not fear, for I am with you . . . Isaiah 51.12-16 I, even I, am He who comforts you . . . Isaiah 53.3-5 He was despised and forsaken of men . . .Surely our griefs He Himself bore . . . Matthew 5.4 Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted. John 14.27 Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you . . . Romans 8.37-39 But in all these things, we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us . . . 1 Corinthians 15.51-57 Behold, I tell you a mystery; we shall not all sleep, but we will all be changed . . . 2 Corinthians 1.3,4 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort . . . Philippians 4.6-9 Be anxious for nothing . . . 1 Thessalonians 4.3-18 But we do not want you to be uninformed, brethren, about those who are asleep . . . Revelation 7.14-17 . . . They will hunger no longer, nor thirst anymore; nor will the sun beat down on them, nor any heat . . . Rev. 21.3-5 . . . and He will wipe away every tear from their eyes . . .
